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#tourlife resumes


We are finally back on tour, albeit a limited schedule with limited fields and limited purses. But hey, better that what we had a week ago and I bet the bald englishman living in lockdown Scumbury Victoria would like to be playing.


The Shooter ventured south for an hour and 20 minutes to a place that, whilst isn't the best has had some good scores in recent Shooter memory.


After registration, I find out The Shooter is with a major sponsor team again, I am a sponsor magnet, either they have heard of The Shooter or I am known for giving the amateurs a good day. I think the former.

Straight to the range and pick out a good mat to hit off, get myself some balls out of the bin, another bucket of pearls here, no dimples, all brown, look like they have dredged a dam to get them. Wow, don't they fly well.


Shotgun start, out to the 9th, Index 1, it's only 420 meters uphill into a 3 club wind, not sure why its rated so hard.

Hit the driver pretty well, the 18 marker hits his driver 3 yards short of mine, mmm, not sure but 18 may be generous. 173 into the teeth of it uphill, 4 iron that looks all over the flag, until it lands on the green 45 feet short.

The first putt goes 30 feet and the next 15 footer misses low side left and Shooter starts with a little 3 wiggle bogey.


10 is a par 5, now downwind off the right, driver and then miss the green with a wedge from 140, flub a chip off the hardpan near the next tee, get the next on, miss the 4 footer, Mr wiggly strikes again. Next is a 137 metre par 3 back into, punch a 6 iron 15 feet off the ground, stays short, flub the chip into the grain and make 4. Now 3 over through 3 in a 3 club wind on a golf course that is as hard as the road. Welcome back to the tour. Fuck me.


Next drive hits the road and shoots off into the trees, my amateur partner bets me I cant get it on the green from there. I say "sure, how much". Its only 110 meters behind some trees, so I cant go up, I would have to hook it 30 meters and run it across the corrugated ground up the fringe to an elevated green that slopes away from me. Shouldn't be that hard.


25 feet, pay up Fucker. Then holed the putt.


Birdie the next, par the next, birdie the next after hitting an 8 iron 128 meters into wind to a foot, par the next par 5, chip it to 30 centimetres for par on the next and par 18.

Now we have made the turn at -1 (back 9) but have the ugly bogey on 9 to contend with.

Still back to even par with 8 to play, not bad on this place.


Mr Wiggly returns on 1 to make a bogey, knock a driver 67 meters from the hole on 2 knock in on the back edge and 3 jiggle that for bogey again, par the next, hit a 4 iron on the green on 4, two putt for birdie, fuck me wonders will never cease.

Fat 4 iron second shot up the next leads to another bogey, then miss the green down 6 with a wedge for another bogey, for fucks sake, get this shit together Shooter.

Miss the green on the front fringe after fluffing one up out of the dirt on 7, putted that from the fringe and the fucking electric eel bit me again for another bogey. How many times can I three putt today.


One to play, 8th hole, driver and flushed it, 117 left into the wind to an elevated green, flag is cut on a hill that slopes away, fuck me, who did this.

Best shot of the day, punch 8 iron under the wind, lands and hits the hole, settles a foot behind it, not even the wobbly putter can miss this.


Tough day, Tied for 5th place and picked up some petrol money for the trip home.

Another tour event on Monday.


Grateful to be back Shooter out.



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