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Back to the usual 4

We played some very uninspiring golf on Sunday.

It was Stickers and Shooter vs the chop chop brothers. I had to use a tennis elbow strap as well so I could pick up a club, fuck me didn’t the other choppers have a crack at me about that.

At the turn, Stickers and I were 1 up and won the front, I thought we would have been a couple down given Contribution had 1 million shots. Stickers was 4, Singlets was 8 and I was 7. No real joy there. Contribution was nearly leading the individual When Stickers realized he had a 3 shot lead his mouth went into gear and he talked it up.

Singlets bet $5 that he would break 80 (had to shoot -1 over the back), Stickers took that bet. Singlets also bet $5 that Stickers wouldn’t break 80 (had to shoot worse than +4 over the back), Stickers also took that bet. I told Stickers he couldn’t win and it wouldn’t be long before I was in the lead, he laughed, I didn’t bet.

The back 9 was set up as the showdown. Shooter comes to life when the chips are down, birdied 10, now 2 shots behind, par 11, birdie 12, now 1 shot behind, par 13, now square. Stickers shitting himself. He is choking that hard he is dry reaching. Singlets hits it right on 13 tee, cold top rescue, pitch to 30 yards short, kicked head over to the cart, unstrapped bag, paid bets and left. It was sad seeing him walk away, wallet lighter, head down crying.

14 tee, group in front very slow social players. Contribution hits tee shot, realises that the Shooter is almost unbeatable at the stage, reaches into wallet, get a lobster, pays Shooter, leaves. Catches up to Singlets. I think they both cried together in the cart on the way back to the clubhouse.

Now there is only Stickers and Shooter left. 4 holes ago Stickers had a 3 shot lead, now he is shaking, no signs of the talk up little poofter that was prancing around the 10th tee. Both hit the fairway, Stickers hits a pull into the trees over the fairway bunkers for his second, Shooter 10 yards off the green. Then Stickers tries to pull one of the best lines I have ever heard. He tries to get me to agree to walk straight to 15 fairway and play that as a par 3 to get in front of the social players. At the same time he wants to make the 14th void for the individual. He must think I am stupider than I look, I told him that I will find his ball in the shit and I will make 4 and he will make a shitload. He can’t believe I wouldn’t agree.   I made 4 he made 7. Shooter now leads by 3, it’s like taking candy from a baby. Too easy.   Par 15 each, Shooter makes bogey on 16, no drama though as Stickers makes 6. Not much petrol left in Stickers tank. He is in trouble, under the immense pressure being set upon by a rampaging Shooter, still -2 for the back. Stickers hits a weak pop up cut on top of the right bunkers 40 yards short of the 17th green, Shooter has a 20 footer. Another shot to Shooter now 5 up. It’s a long walk down 18 for Stickers, he is thinking he should have known better than to gob off on 10 tee. I am walking behind him and with the sun in his back he looks very similar to Singlets who made that same walk only an hour and a half before, tired, hungry and beat up.   After we putt out, for 1 second I feel a little sad for the boys. 2 left early, the 3rd should have left early. 

Beware the injured Shooter.

Come from behind Shooter out.


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