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Q School – Final Round 2018

sad brad

New day, new Shooter.

Second round of Q School for 2018, all I need is a 66 and I am a chance to make it, stranger things have happened.

7:00 Drawn with the other dew kickers, a little cold like my driver but The Shooter has other plans today, light this fucker up. Second off, manage a little thin cut that reaches a height of 4 feet apex at 120 meters, almost took out the posts along the cart path. Bowza the tour caddie of the year comments that it will be hard to get the splinters out of the ball. Fuck me his pay cheque is looking bad already. Manage to find the surface, rolled a little 12 footer 3 feet by, make the par. Nice start.

Second hole, Shooter has a 40 footer from the front edge, playing partner marks his ball with what can only be described as a man hole cover, bigger than the fucking Huna coin that Stickers was peddling a few years ago. Its 3 feet right of my line so I say its fine. Standing over the putt, all I can see is that fucking marker. Yep, I roll the putt up and it fucking hits it. I even yelled as it was 3 feet away “cant believe I have hit the man hole cover”. He still used the fucking thing all day.

Even par through 9, with a bogey and a birdie. Need to go deep from here for a chance. Fuck me if I don’t hit the worst shot of the day down 10, so dead, I can smell it from the tee. Tour caddie says “its 4 iron from there” Thanks genius, no fucking KFC for him later. Then he tells my playing partner who is Greek, he has Niblick shoes on so there is no way he can make the field and asks weather he has Halloumi and olives in his golf bag for a snack, I apologise for the culturally insensitive fucking idiot. Greg says its fine because he does have some Halloumi. I told him its ok to “give him a swivel kick to the head mate” in my best Greek accent. I’m no racist.

Bogey 10 and 12 after failing to get up and down. we arrive at 13, that little fucker I made double on yesterday. Into wind playing 139, punch 6 is the only shot here, I can just see it. Steep as fuck, fat punch, left into the bunker, one fucking day I am going to make par there. The infamous snowman hole from yesterday, 14, Fuck this, driver thanks Bowza, “are you sure Mr Shooter, maybe a little lay up…….” Give The Shooter the fucking chief, no prisoners today. Bowza had his eyes closed, he thought he may find the ball from yesterday if this one went hard right.

What he didn’t see was a expertly hit Driver which landed on the fringe of the green and settled 40 feet from the hole, still in the fringe but two putts later Shooters revenge has been exacted. 8 one day 3 the next Fuck you 14th.

Turn back into the wind to come home and hit a skank, half neck 4 iron the same as the day before, make bogey, next tee shot finds a fucking hole. make bogey, next par 5 into hurricane now plays Driver, 3 Wood, 3 wood, flub chip bogey. Fuck me get off this train.

Casual par on 18 to finish the event ahead of a couple of other choppers.

Disappointing campaign to say the least. Club Champs here we come.

Humbled Amateur Shooter out.


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